Once upon a time there was a beautiful young lady named Cherri. Every Valentine’s Day she hoped someone would remember her with candy or flowers. But year after year no one gave them to her. She dated lots of guys but no one special. After she had sex with them they just seemed to wander off, especially around holidays and her birthday. She never quite figured it out.

One year on Valentine’s Day her doorbell rang. It was only her neighbor upstairs asking if she would take in her mail while she and her boyfriend went on a romantic weekend trip. Another year her bell rang again on Valentine’s day but it was a false alarm. Finally just last year she decided not to stay home waiting for the bell to ring, she would just go out by herself and have a good time at the movies, maybe even stop for a sundae on the way home. As she let herself into her apartment house she saw a bouquet of flowers in front of her door. Red roses they were. Who could have sent them, and why hadn’t she stayed home? As she took them inside she noticed that they weren’t real flowers, just cheap silk ones with plastic raindrops on them. Oh well she thought, better than nothing. When she set them lovingly on her table she took the card in her hands, almost afraid to open it. Finally she read,” To Mrs. Clancey, the best cleaning lady I have ever had”. Signed, Mrs Peter Stolle.

Her name was not Mrs. Clancey and she was no one’s cleaning lady. She put the flowers back out in the hallway, away from her door, with a sign on them that read, Valentines Day stinks.