Things I have learned working at Arrow Publications

By Tiff Pantone,

  • Never run away from a tennis star…you might get stuck in an earthquake.
  • Be nice to the local millionaire, he might just seduce you by a fireplace.
  • Never have sex in the woods…you WILL get pregnant.
  • Never go on a trip looking for lost keepsakes, you will cheat on your fiancé…and get robbed…
  • Be careful when re-uniting with lost loves, they might be blind, and will scare easily.
  • Use caution when falling in love on a cruise, you never know who’s getting on at the next port.
  • Don’t fall in love with your police partner, he will get shot.
  • Don’t interfere with love; your aunt’s dog will be stolen!
  • Always carry mace when running in the park, unless you run into an ambassador from Greece.
  • Don’t pick a fight with your childhood rival, he just might do you in a hot tub, and a shower, and his private jet, and on a beach…before a Tsunami…
  • Don’t get on a plane; especially if you’re already pretty, you WILL be scarred for life.
  • When protecting a rock star, proceed with caution, even though he’s sexy, someone will want to kill him. Just wear your holster in bed…
  • When working together with old crushes after hurricanes, clothing tends to fall off easily.
  • If you are a songwriter, you will get framed for drug possession, just sleep with the singer’s ex-boyfriend and cooperate in a sting.

Can you guess the story each of these lessons come from?